Day 4: Wallace > Daylesford > Wallace

I think I like being on holidays more than I like being at work. Driving around and seeing stuff is much more interesting and satisfying for me that going to work every day.

So if you feel inclined to donate some of your annual leave so that I can spend more time on holidays and blogging, I’m OK with that. Just putting it out there.

For those of you that have travelled with us before – vicariously, I mean – you would know that I sometimes use the first line of a song as the title of the post. If I was to choose a song for this post, there are two standouts that spring to mind:

• I’m coming home, I’ve done my time … “Tie a Yellow Ribbon” (Tony Orlando & Dawn), or
• Blue skies, smiling at me – “Blue Skies” (Willy Nelson)

The forecast for Wallace while we were here was cold and wet, with highs around 12 or 13 degrees each day.

What actually happened was that we packed and dressed for cold weather but got days with highs in the mid-20s, and something between cloudy and blue skies.

Today was a blue skies kinda day.

Before I tell you about today, I’m going to rewind to last night. We had planned an early night because 11 hours in the car and about 600km on the road and we were pretty wiped out. We had stopped in Ballarat on the way home and picked up some Indian food for dinner, and by the time we had finished that and done the blog it was getting pretty late (10.00pm, which I acknowledge is really only 9.00pm).

But we had one really important job to do: we needed to apply for our Queensland Entry passes. MBW and I needed to get ours done, but we couldn’t do Maddie’s until today (Wednesday) if we were able to faithfully say that she hadn’t been overseas for 14 days.

So MBW and I went through the incredibly torturous process of applying for our passes and attaching all manner of documentary evidence, and at the end of that process we received an ambiguous message that seemed to indicate that we could be waiting for up to 3 days to get our approval … which could be a problem because – at that time – we were leaving in 2 days.

But the lovely Anastasia P must have a legion of peeps frantically reviewing applications, even at 10.30pm at night, and we got our approvals about 10 minutes later.

All of which made it easy to put my head on the pillow and slip into a coma.

I woke this morning to find the fireplace stone cold again today, ironically for the same reasons as yesterday. If you don’t know why it was cold on Tuesday morning you will need to go back to yesterday’s post and catch-up. I don’t have the time to tell that story again.

Sadly despite yesterday morning’s success at getting the fireplace lit, today was a dismal failure. I simply could not get it started, so I gave up. My kingdom for some accelerant.

My inner pyromaniac could not be reached 🙁

At breakfast we acknowledged that our #1 job was to get Maddie’s Queensland Entry Pass application into the system, because we are acutely aware that her application can be best summed up by the Seasame Street crew when they sing “One of these things is not like the others, One of these things is not quite the same …”

Maddie’s ID is not a Medicare card, but a Zimbabwe passport. Maddie’s proof of vaccination is not AZ or Pfizer, but some other (albeit internationally approved) version that you get in Zimbabwe.

A whole lot of things that might cause an above-average Entry Pass giver reason to look a bit closer and maybe ask their supervisor for advice. And we are flying tomorrow.

We had breakfast and set to work using our combined intellect to submit Maddie’s application and hope for the best.

So once that important job was completed and the “Submit” button clicked, we busied ourselves getting ready for today’s outing – a day trip to Daylesford and surrounds as advised but our tourist guide, my sister Barb.

Now I’m just going to digress for a few moments. I feel like I’d like to say that I am the epitome of a hen-pecked husband, but MBW told me I’m not allowed to say that because it makes her look bad, and that if I was to say things like that about her she will be very disappointed with me. So I won’t say it.

What I will say is that there are some things that I like to eat – peas, cooked carrots – but because “Mama don’t like peas and carrots, nobody gets peas and carrots for dinner” in our house.

Apparently Maddie doesn’t like peas and carrots either, so they are kindred spirits.

MBW doesn’t like her toast at breakfast to go cold before she butters it, whereas I don’t really care.

Apparently Maddie doesn’t like her toast to go cold before she butters it either … and so it goes.

If the Seasame Street crew were here at breakfast, they’d be singing “One of these things is not like the others …” and they’d be singing about me!!

Anyhow, back to the story. Here is a quick recap in case you are lost: No fire, breakfast, Maddie’s Queensland Entry Pass application, hot toast, dishes, sunny skies, wish I’d brought shorts, Daylesford. OK?

As we were in the final stages of getting ready to get away for today’s drive, I recalled that TOWS where we were staying has been a number of things in the past, including a bank. In an irony for the morning, I noticed that there are bars on the window, which just gave me a funny and ironic feeling like I am in jail, which I almost will be for the next 14 days of home quarantine.

The other irony in all of this is that I could have chosen “Tie a Yellow Ribbon” for today’s post. Spooky.

We got all of our stuff ready to put into the rocket, and my phone went “bing” for an incoming email, and Maddie’s approved entry pass had arrived. Nothing stopping us now from flying home tomorrow Thursday!! Yay!!

We all climbed onto … er, into the rocket, set the GPS for Daylesford, set Spotify to a “Positive Vibes” playlist (we couldn’t find a “Daytrip to Daylesford” playlist), set the aircon to cool, and I looked for a setting to set the rocket to “a pleasant drive in the country so that I can enjoy the view rather than go flat out”, but couldn’t find one.

There are such pretty drives around this beautiful part of the world that you just want to slow down and enjoy it. As a wise person once said, “it’s the journey, not the destination” and that is certainly true.

I need to tell you a little bit about the rocket. I can’t decide whether I like it or not, but I’m pretty sure that I wouldn’t buy one.

It has this bad flat spot way down in the low rev range, so when you are starting to take off in a tricky manoeuvre to get across oncoming traffic, you put your foot on the accelerator and nothing happens, other than this sense that the car is saying “do I really have to?”

So in a moment of near-panic when you think you are at risk of being T-Boned by an oncoming B-Double truck, you push the accelerator down harder and the turbo kicks in, and you get launched forward with an unexpected and unnecessary level of violence. Fuel economy plummets, the rocket surges forward, wheels spin, rubber is left on the road, and MBW gives me a disapproving sideways glance because I’m being irresponsible.

And Maddie is sitting in the back seat WhatsApping or listening to Spotify, completely oblivious to all that is happening in the world.

Even more bizzare, the turbo does the same thing when the rocket is in reverse. If you are backing uphill out of a parking space and you give it too much of a squirt, you find yourself launched backwards with the same unexpected and unnecessary violence.

Which is pretty scary.

I’ve also figured out why the lane assist is such an important feature. It’s not because anyone thinks that I am a bad driver with the concentration span of a banana. It’s something else entirely.

It’s all because the process of poking, touching, swiping, and navigating the touch-screen to simply adjust the air conditioning fan speed is so complex and time-consuming that you will inevitably be on the wrong side of the road lining yourself up for a head-on collision with a bus by the time you have it all figured out. So the lane control system is an important safety feature when you are adjusting the aircon.

On top of all the other warning bells, beeps and alerts, I’ve also discovered “Door open warning system” and a “wheels not straight” warning system. Hmmm.

So while it is fun to drive, I don’t think I’d buy one. Sorry MG 🙁

OK, so I know that you were not expecting a car review here on the blog, but it is just an extra service that I provide, and at no extra cost.

The first thing that MBW (and Maddie, of course) wanted to do in Daylesford was to go to the Amazing Mill Markets which is billed as a “collection of vintage clothes, vintage furniture, collectables, memorabilia … “ and so on.

When I say “Maddie, of course” I’m referring to the “one of these things is not like the others” discussion earlier, as trawling around somebody else’s junk … er memorabilia is something that I have a fairly low tolerance and enthusiasm for.

You will notice in one of the pictures below that I am wearing my mask while sitting with a gorilla – that was just because we were unable to socially distance.

We were “welcomed” at the entrance by a rather unfriendly woman who insisted on seeing our check-in and vaccination certificates (they do that quite a bit here in Melbourne) before allowing us to browse.

Despite that, we wandered around for an hour or so and left with only a bottle of fig and walnut jam – go figure!

Next stop was the town centre for a coffee and a wander around. Coffee at the Larder as recommended by Barb …

… followed by a wander up and down the Main Street going in and out of various homewares and craft shops on the way.

Somewhere along the line I found myself carrying this packet. I had no input into the selection of what is inside the bag and I don’t know what it is, but I suspect that it won’t be the healthiest thing that we eat today 🙁

Next stop was the Wombat Hill Botanical Gardens – another recommendation from Barb – and a great one too. Delightful gardens, all very green and lush and fragrant. Some of the trees – like the Douglas Pine – must be hundreds of years old.

One of the more interesting sculptures/statues in the gardens was this one below that looks like a child trying to pull a splinter out of his foot. On closer inspection I could see that it is called “Boy pulling a splinter out of his foot” – very imaginative!!

Even more interesting, it was very apparent that the boy was naked, which required some creative and careful photography to ensure that his boy bits were not in the photo. But it also caused me to wonder why he is walking around the gardens naked, and that he is lucky that he got the splinter in his foot because somewhere else would have been painful and unpleasant.

I forgot to confess that we all had a bit of a sleep-in this morning – MBW and I didn’t wake until 8.00am – but then it’s pretty easy to have the sleep of the dead when you don’t have to go to work the next day and you have possession of your Queensland Entry Pass.

So by the time we had done Daylesford we were ready to head back home to TOWS for a late lunch and a quiet afternoon.

We travelled through some very pretty countryside on the way home, but to be honest everything is very pretty out this way and I can understand why people live here.

We saw this rather unusual sign – well, unusual for us Queenslanders – warning about the risk of icy roads coming out of Daylesford. The last time that MBW and I saw a sign like that we were driving over the Smokey Mountains into Tennessee back in 2019.

By the time that we got back to Wallace, the clouds were rolling in and we were preparing ourselves for some rain … not entirely unexpected given that it has been forecast all week.

And to cap it all off, the “Positive Vibes” playlist gave us my song – “Rocket Man” sung by none other than Sir Elton himself – on the trip home. The perfect end to the perfect day.

We got home to find that Derby – the guy who runs TOWS with Trudi – had popped in and got the fire going where I had been unsuccessful. Now that the blog is done there is a good chance that I will lie down on the couch in front of the fire and let off a few ZZZs. I have a bit of a sleep debt that I’d like to try and repay.

It’s been a great day and a really relaxing few days in Victoria.

Tomorrow we head back to Coburg to collect Maddie’s remaining suitcases, load up the rocket one last time and head to Tullamarine Airport for our Jetstar flight home.

But that is tomorrow’s news 🙂

PS: Maddie has a disturbing trait that I hadn’t known until now. Despite MBW’s and my differences (refer peas and carrots etc), one of the things we strongly agree on is that Turkish Delight is a blight on the Favourites Box, and we have never understood how or why anyone would eat it.

We secretly hoped that Maddie would be a Turkish Delight lover, but alas, she has consumed most of the chocolates out of the bowl here, and it appears that she doesn’t like Turkish Delight either. Shame 🙁

Ciao

#BringMaddieHome2021