There are three things that I hoped wouldn’t happen on this trip:
- I wouldn’t have to use the orange emergency triangle in Claude’s boot;
- I wouldn’t ever be sitting at the side of the road with the Gendarmarie (Police) sitting behind me with their blue flashing lights on; and
- I don’t get explosive diarrhoea.
Well I’m pleased to report that I haven’t had explosive diarrhoea.
Yet.
It’s a looooong story.
We have been staying at Bernard and Yolande’s place in Strasbourg for the last 4 nights. Their AirBNB is beautiful, with a bit of a French Revolution theme going on. We’ve had a lovely time there, and it was sad to leave.
Bernard and Yolande are lovely people too. At 8.20am we gave them the 10 minute warning that we were packed and almost ready to go, and then we spent the next 20 minutes chatting with them.
We had a long drive today – about 450km and a bit over 4 hours. 450km disappears pretty quickly when you sit on 130km/h all day.
And that was all we did. 130km/h, hour after hour.
We stopped and put about 20 litres of fuel into Claude, and got coffee, but I have no idea where was. Somewhere not very memorable.
At 12.00pm MBW got onto the Intergoogle and found a boulangerie that got 4.8 stars from a gazillion reviews, so we went there. It was some tiny little place in the middle of nowhere, but we’ve had some amazing success with boulangeries in the middle of nowhere.
Until today.
We went in and there was maybe a half dozen baguettes on the shelf, and nothing else.
The lady didn’t speak any English, but we didn’t need words to know we weren’t getting anything to eat there.
So a bit more time on the Intergoogle and we found another option, just down the road.
We stopped in a place that may have been Mourmelon-le-Petit, and found another boulangerie. And this one was the jackpot.
We got what we think was a sausage roll, a pizza sub kind of thing, and palmier for dessert.
This little village was also very quiet, and we asked the lady who served us if it is holidays. She explained via gestures and Google Translate that in France, you go home for lunch and have a rest. That’s why nobody is around.
I like that idea.
One of the things we’ve noticed about France is that there is never anywhere to pull off the road and stop for lunch. In any country town in Queensland, you are guaranteed that by doing a quick lap of the town you will find a park with swings, and tables and seats.
Probably toilets too.
But not in France. You’re lucky if you can find somewhere just to pull off the road.
So we headed off out of Mourmelon-le-Petit, and found a clearing at an intersection, so we pulled Claude off the road and had lunch.
It was only another hour to Congis-sur-Thérouanne, where we are staying for 2 nights, so we kept on.
It was a totally uneventful trip, and we arrived at Patricia and Gerard’s AirBNB in Congis-sur-Thérouanne at around 2.30pm.
We unpacked Claude, took everything inside, and had a cuppa.
One of our FLP is turning 2 years old a couple of days after we arrive home, so we thought we’d pop out to see if we could find something to take home for her birthday. It’s not like our suitcases aren’t heavy enough already.
So Joséphine got new instructions, and we set off and out through Congis-sur-Thérouanne around 3.30pm to the local E.Lecerc, about 10 minutes away.
We also noted the location of a recommended restaurant and the local boulangerie on our way out of town.
I’ve mentioned before that the streets are very narrow, and MBW is often uneasy at how close to the edge of the road we go when we pass another vehicle that is normally going ridiculously fast in the 30hm/h zone.
To be fair, I feel much the same way about having a head-on collision with someone coming the other way.
Everything is a compromise.
So we were heading out of Congis-sur-Thérouanne, doing maybe 40km/h on a very narrow road with cars and a bus coming towards us.
There was an almighty bang, and it was very quickly obvious that Claude’s front right tyre was going flat.
By the time I was able to pull over, we were on a stretch of road with little usable grassy verge to stop on, but no other options.
In Europe, new cars don’t come with a spare tyre. If you get a puncture, you have an inflation kit in the boot that plugs the hole and inflates the tyre until you can get it repaired.
So, high visibility vest on, hazard lights on, orange emergency triangle 100m down the road and I was ready to inflate the tyre.
Sadly, some puncture holes are too big to plug with the magic liquid.
In the unlikely event that you can’t get the tyre inflated, call a tow truck.
We called an emergency recovery service and waited. A couple of good Samaritans stopped to ask if we needed help, but there was nothing they could do.
So we waited. We got a call from the tow truck driver, but he couldn’t speak English and we sent him a pin in Google Maps to show where we were. We just needed to get to the nearest Citroën dealership – about 20 minutes away – to get the tyre replaced.
The third vehicle that stopped was the Gendermerie. Blue lights on and out they came.
I have to say that they were very helpful, even calling the tow truck driver to explain our location and problem, then waited with us directing traffic around the scene.
They were looking at their mobile phones and having a whispered conversation which made me uncomfortable. They probably found a whole bunch of pending speeding tickets 😞
The only way we could go with Claude was to sit in the back seat (of Claude) on the back of the tow truck, which frankly just seemed wrong to me, but the boys in blue seemed happy with that.
Probably happier than having to drive us somewhere.
We finally arrived at Citroën Meaux – Meaux is another township about 15 minutes away – around 5.15pm to be told that they can’t change the tyre until Monday.
So our car people organised a taxi to pick us up and take us to Paris CDG airport, because that was the closest place they could get us a hire car for 2 days.
So rather than get someone to change the tyre for us urgently, they paid €125 to take us by taxi to Paris CDG, and hired a car for us for 2 days, so we can fly home on Sunday.
That’s the day before Claude can get a new tyre.
And then they are going to have to take Claude back to CDG to hand him back.
Sigh.
So we say goodbye and RIP to our faithful Claude, and we welcome Robèrt the Renault to the family.
I’ll introduce you to Robèrt tomorrow, but he won’t be in the family for long.
By the time we navigated our way out of CDG and got back to Congis-sur-Thérouanne, it was 8.30pm and we had a late dinner.
As for the birthday present for our FLP who is turning 2? Maybe we will give her a framed copy of the tow truck invoice for towing Claude to Meaux.
Or maybe we will save on excess baggage costs and buy something with our AUD when we get home.
Ciao
#Europe2025